While I wait for my grand childrens visit starring at the fruits which my sister brought and remember the old days when we used to fight with each other. Remembering those funny moments silly fights, I would shed a tear for every time I see my mothers face in those hazing memories.
That day I would see myself through every pattern of my life, I would forget how old I am, my mind would move so fast through time yet I would remember every detail of it I would see every color crystal clear. The color of the sari my mother wore when I was scared to go to school. The taste of dishes which my granny prepared. The day I made it to my B.tech. Her happy smile when I completed my graduation.The way I cried when i had to leave my best friends forgetting there were juniors and teachers around. The smell of the last 500/- which my daddy gave before my first day at office. The tears of the day when i had to be alone far from home. Waiting for call from home on my first birthday away from home. The way I was scared when I told my mom about my girl friend. And the way she handled the situation helping me come out of the turmoil of my troubled mind. And a lot more, which would happen in the next 40 years will all come to my mind like a flock of birds each memory chasing to be the best yet they will all be the winners, the memories which have kept me alive until that day before my death will all be rushing through my veins giving me the complete satisfaction of the last day of my life.
The day when I would be so lost in memories that instead of counting pros and cons of my life the mistakes which I made the good things which I have done, I would start enjoying them living the moments in those memories. I would be so lost in a thousands of TV's showing various angles of my life thousands of people who I met and yet I will not be confused I will understand every detail of it. I would thank god for every moment of my life. I would thank my parents for giving me a life and the life for giving me such nice people to live with and the people in my life for giving me all these memories.
Perhaps this is the moment which makes death so beatiful so astonishing so mysterious yet so perfect. I will realize that day when a tear flows from my eyes that I have earned it all, the hard work which I have put into my life. All those days when I got wet in rain and sweat in sun have paid more than I thought, as they give me complete satisfaction of my life. I will thank god again a thousand times realizing what my life was about, the happiness of life and the beauty of death. I would request him to take me away at that very second as I do not want to wake up, live another day which would dominate all these beautiful memories with tears in eyes of the people whom I love the most.
Although I want to see all their happy faces one another time, fight with my sister one last time, taste my mothers dishes one last time, want my daddy to hold my hand, one last argument with my friends and a thousand more things which would make me want to live just another day and yet another day and so on. I will have to cut those wishes I will have to stay strong and tell my self it was enough I had more than what i deserved out of this life. That will be the day I will tell him I am done, this is more than what I asked for let me come to you, and I will request him that I do want to live another life may be suffer again but may be that life would give me memories even half of what I had in this life on that second before I die.
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