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Need to Control One's Temper

BY: arundhati jena | Category: Relationships | Submitted: 2010-09-25 21:45:07
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Article Summary: "Anger is something which destroys someone completely so we need to control our temper. When you are angry count 1 to 10, when you are very angry count 1 to 100.."


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An outburst of temper is a common matter now a days because of tension of living. We all are subjected to it in varying degrees. When something goes wrong, something happens which we don't like ..

When we meet with an unexpected obstacle, we get upset and forget to apply our judgment. Then it is that we are in temper or fly into rage.We explode violently and under the fit of that distemper,we say or do many things which we should not have said or done,and which,indeed we often regret bitterly later on.this is how our unconscious passions get the better of our conscious reason.

This is surely not desirable. By losing our temper,we create discord at home and abroad,in private as well as public life.We go down in popular esteem. People get afraid of us ,& avoid us for our violent and irate temper. Many a sweet relation breaks off because of this unpredictable temper.

But an uncontrolled temper is not only an convenience in our worldly life, it is bad for our health. The angry man is always in a highly tense state. He can't reason,he can't think,he is ruled by his passion that eats up reason and good sense. He becomes irritable and uncharitable to others in personal life. To move in a cultured society one has to keep suavity of temper. Newman says,a gentleman is one who gives least pain to others One should not go berserk over a matter in the heat of the moment. That costs not only friendship but mars a good speech, being blind to logic and even risking health.

Emersion said, " A man should study ever to keep cool ; he makes his inferiors his superiors by heat". Whenever we feel the impulse to say or do something in a fit of temper,we should check ourselves. Self -restraint can be and should become a matter of habit .

But should we never lose our temper ? Aristotle says, "Anybody can become angry ; that is easy. But to be angry with the right person and in the right degree and at the right time ,and for the right purpose, and in the right way that is not in everybody's power and is not easy". Anger that is aroused by moral indignation is always righteous. A gusty man protests strongly when he notices a grave wrong being committed. That is known as corrective indignation. But he should not be wild.

An outburst of temper is often a salutary corrective for the negligent or the indifferent. Parents and teachers often have to be angry where mildness has failed. Indeed, the hardest of victory is the victory over self.

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