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Disadvantages of Arranged MarriageBY: Jo Justin | Category: Relationships | Submitted: 2010-06-30 04:52:59
Arranged marriages are causing more harm than good to the couples involved and the society at large. An arranged marriage is a marriage that is pre-arranged by some person other than the couple involved. These people try to bring the couple together and convince them with reasons why they should marry each other. These marriages have many disadvantages.
People who arrange marriages between two people have some goals and objectives that they wish to attain and may use the marriage as an opportunity to attain such. For instance, parents may insist their child marries someone from a wealthy home so their financial needs can be met. The marriage other than benefiting the couple, rather seeks to serve the interests of the arranger. In this case, there is a greater possibility that the arranger will be interfering in the marriage, depriving the couple their privacy.
Values and habits vary from individual to individual. What may be valuable to the arranger of the marriage may not necessarily be valuable to the couple in the marriage. A marriage arranger may for instance value financial status of one of the couple, while the couple may value love above financial or social status. This is bound to cause problems in the marriage and may eventually break down.
Most arranged marriages lack love that may keep the marriage. The marriage was arranged by someone else who had his or her own interests and so the couple may not have interest in it. Additionally, such marriages are arranged within a short time that, the couple do not take time to develop for each other. The marriage becomes more of living-together than a marriage. These marriages breaks down at the least provocation.
People who get married by arrangement by another person are seen as not being on their own. They are seen as having a weak will and incapable of making their own decisions. This may prompt unpleasant comments from family members and other people. These comments may demoralize the couple and may make them loose self confidence. This especially affects the men in the marriage as they are seen as incapable of proposing to a woman and so someone has to do it on their behalf. The psychological effects can be destructive.
This is the main effect of an arranged marriage. The couple may not know each other well and only get to know after they are married. They now get to identify the strengths and weaknesses of each other, which may be probably too late. They suffer a lot of incompatibility problems as a result. Arranged marriages usually skip the process of courtship which allows the couple to get to know each other.
An arranged marriage should not be encouraged as it brings too many disadvantages to the couple and society. Most of them do not last long and those that last are full of problems. Everybody should be given the right to choose who he or she loves and will be comfortable spending the rest of their lives with.
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