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Take care of old parents | Should I go back to India ?BY: Bharat | Category: Family | Post Date: 2009-07-22
NRI's from India who come to United States, Australia, Canada, Britain or elsewhere always feel a sense of responsibility towards their parents. There is always a feeling of guilt that they have left their parents alone, all by themself in India. Most NRI's feel pretty hard to accept the fact that they may not be able to help their parents in their old age as previously expected, in the same the way their parents took care of their own parents (your grand parents). There is always a confusion on the back of one's mind - Should I go back to India or continue to stay in (say) United States. Most NRI's plan to come abroad only for 2-3 years and then go back home after they have gained rich international work experience and of course good money too. REASONS NRI's DO NOT WANT TO GO BACK:1. Higher Salary: This is usually the number one reason. People like Managers, Software Engineers, Doctors etc .. do not want to go back because of their high pay scale in foreign countries. A person can easily earn more than most CEO's in India. 2. Corruption free lifestyle: A normal person living in United States never sees any corruption. Police, firefighters, teachers, postman and basically everyone is honest. 3. Clean Environment: In most western countries, even if you take a lung full of air it still feels fresh. 4. No social pressures: You can live life in your own way. You do not have people coming at our home every day. No chacha ji, mama ji, auntie ji etc .. 5. Issues in India: Pollution, corruption, safety, show-off, electricity cuts, water cuts, bribery, GUNDA-gardi, schooling for children, weather and the list goes on.. BUT PARENTS .. WHO WILL TAKE CARE OF THEM?If you have a brother or sister with whom your old parents can live during their retirement, you are very lucky. This might be a good reason for you to not to go. Most of the following arguments are for individuals who do not have a sibling to take care of their aging parents. Ask your parents: "Dad/Mom should I come back to India?". Their answer will be one of the two: Answer 1: "No son, we are fine. Don't worry about us. We are having a nice time and feel proud to see you rise in a foreign country" Answer 2: "Son, please come back. Get a good job in India and then we will all live together" In both cases they are saying because they LOVE YOU. They desperately want to live with you regardless of their answer. You can understand their perspective only when you become a parent yourself. In many cases it is too late to return by then. A brother, friend or a relative can be jealous of you even if they souund so sweet from outside, but the only people in this world who will always be with you are your parents (Period!). Your parents really need you. Do you know their biggest fear? They are actually quite scared to admit that if one of them passes away they will be damm lonely and unsecure. Strong family bonds have always been the power of India society. Taking care of your old parents sets a very good example for your own children. Lot of people do not return because their wife's do not want to go back. She may say: "I cannot live with your mom, she will interfere with our life". Come on !! There will always be small issues about compatibility and things you like or dislike, but one needs to manage them smartly. Who says life in India will be like walking on a red carpet. Other people think "I will tell my parents to come and live with me" Think from their perspective, they will never want to come and live in a new country at that point in their life. They have friends, relatives and habits with are very tough to change. They have no friends in a foreign country, no work and no good way of commuting around. Even if they decide to come and stay with you, it's their compromise with life and nothing else. Some people think that sending money monthly will be enough. Frankly, it's very helpful for them, you are doing a great job. Please continue to do so, but nothing can replace your presence. They want to stay with you, play with grand kids and feel emotionally and physically secure. If you think life will be tough for you, think how difficult it will be for them in this age. We love comfort and it is not hard to leave good life and go back to the home country where working/living conditions are relative tougher. Your parents have given lot of sacrifices just for you while you were growing up, many of which you don't even know. Do not run away from your responsibilities now when the time has come back to pay back. NRI's will have to certainly make some tough decisions to take care of old parents. Should I go back to India for my parents If you are the only person your parents can rely in their old age, then YES you should certainly return. You and your wife have to be a little less selfish and act more maturely. If nothing else, give a sincere try to go back and try to live there, if it does not work out then return again to the foreign country. Your parents will always feel proud that you at least gave a sincere try to come and live with them. Even if you are in a different city, it is much easier for them to come and meet you within India (or stay with you) than a foreign country. Life in India is not as bad as you think. You will have domestic helpers, less lonely life and your kids will be more attached with you when they grow up. You will not feel an alien living in a foreign country. Don't even think about OLD AGE HOMES - They are nothing more than a place where they will have to simply wait to die. Article Source: http://www.saching.com About Author / Additional Info: Additional Articles: * Reducing the risk of heart attacks: Simple tips everyone can follow. * Finding backlinks by analyzing your competition * TEACHING ENGLISH TO NON-NATIVE SPEAKERS * Which shoe is right for me? * The Magic of Five Seconds of Silence Does this article violate or infringe on your copyright ? It is a violation of our terms for authors to submit content which they did not write and claim it as their own. If this article infringes on your copyrights, then use our Contact us form with the detailed proof of infringement along with the offending article's title, URL and writer name. If you do not hear back from us then contact us again in another 10 days. Thank you. Comments on this article: (4 comments so far) * Additional comments are now closed for this article *
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