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Common dating excuses and mistakes. Tips for successful dating.

BY: Jessica | Category: Relationships | Post Date: 2008-11-03
 



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   Jessica
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When it comes to dating, life seems to be unfair; some people seem to make girl friends (or boy friends) very easily while others struggle or may be just that luck is not on their side. I have several friends who are single and good looking and it is difficult to believe that they are still single. There is one thing common in most of us, we like to make dating excuses, issues about time constraints and numerous of other reasons. Lets see some of the popular dating excuses I have come across recently and useful tips for successful dating.

1. "I am not that handsome (or beautiful)"
Looks play a significant role when it comes to dating, especially when we are very young. Fact of the matter is, majority of couples who I know of has atleast one partner who seems to be not that attractive as the other one. Or in other terms, if they were to pick each other just based on looks, most likely there would have been a rejection from at least one side. We often come across with couples walking together and seem to think how did this average Joe get such a hot babe (or an average girl with a handsome dude).

I believe that dating is a combination of these 7 A's: Aptitude, Attitude, Affluence, Availability, Appearance, Age and Attire. Therefore dating excuses which are based just on appearance are actually overlooking other factors which may be their strong points.

Number one rule about dating is a clean and elegant look. If you feel confident about yourself then you have overcome the appearance barrier of most other people as well. A person who is dressed shabbily or ordinarily has a lesser chance of dating success than a person who is stylish, confident and elegant, even if he/she is not the most handsome or beautiful person in the vicinity.


2. "Because I am not rich"
It's true that money can buy happiness and love "some" times, but certainly not in a long term. We read news about movie stars and famous personalities going through divorce and 2nd or 3rd marriage all the time. For majority of individuals, wealth is just a nice to have factor and not the deciding one. Your chances of finding a perfect partner does not increase "so" drastically if you go out to a formal dinner to a 5 star hotel or a just a regular decent place. Therefore dating excuses based on money are over blown. In fact you are better off finding a like minded date by going to the places you already enjoy and what you can comfortably afford. Pretending heavily just to impress someone works very well if you are looking for a casual hookup or a one night stand.

3. "I do not have time for dating":
All singles love dating, admit it or not (unless you are really taking a temporary break). Other singles will just not come rushing towards you if you cannot have time for them. May be you are just too unorganized and need a better time management. Making repeated dating excuses that you are too busy can ruin your ongoing relationship and finding a new partner if you are already single .. forget about it.

4. "May be I am too honest":
Sometimes when people are extremely honest and straight forward they may pile up enough negativity and discouragement to others "too soon". If you have too many bad news for others then break them slowly and gradually. Being honest does not mean showing only your bad points, it means gradually disclosing both your good and bad points.

5. "I hate online dating":
Many people are scared that their photo will appear on an online dating website which can be seen by others. A conservative approach to dating will likely lower your chance of finding a good partner fast. Today Online dating is the most popular dating location for singles and most online profiles have at least some information about the person which helps you to make an initial judgment whether to approach him/her or not. Similarly people reading your online profile and approaching you that way have already passed your introduction stage. It is much better than meeting an unknown person at a bar or a friends party who you have just seen nothing more than their face. Dating excuses that are based on preventing yourself from exploring places which make you feel uncomfortable to begin with, will obviously lower your chances of finding a good date. Online dating does require some extra common sense and a cautious approach.

6. "There are not good girls in my neighborhood":
It is all in your mind, there are wonderful people (guys and girls) in every corner of the world. Fact of the matter if there are good people everywhere .. remember the old phrase "grass is always greener on the other side". We always get these positive vibes from a distant location, just because we have not tried our luck there yet.

7. "I do not find dates of my kind":
May be you are revisiting the places you always go to and keep meeting the type of individuals who do not appeal you. Try going to a new club, new parties or make new friends. May be you are not just going to the right places you should really be for successful dating.

8. Do not raise the expectations too much:
To impress others, we often do too much to in the beginning and then we regret later. Be what you are and feel confident about it.

9. "Are you too available or too approachable":
The last thing you want others to think about you is that you are too despirate and too much available.

10. "Most important rule of successful dating":
BE CONFIDENT !! Actually a little bit of confidence with laughter will work like a charm.

Article Source: http://www.saching.com



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